Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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