I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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