his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
