he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
