Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
