Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
