Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
