the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I FOUND THE LEGS
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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