You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
