Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize