just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
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