i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize