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Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
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