KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
