Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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