Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
