My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize