I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
The feeling are messing with the penis
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
