i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
i've created a new STD.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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