Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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