we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
