I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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