Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
