on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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