I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
