Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
