How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
