Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
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