About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize