Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize