there was a trapeze. enough said
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
