How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
