Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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