My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
