My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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