If that was your dad, he is hot
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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