So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize