Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
