Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.

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  (847): we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us. http://tfl.nu/woip
  Replies (11) Good night (519) Bad night (1279)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  My hand turned me down

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  (303): My hand turned me down http://tfl.nu/yueq
  Replies (5) Good night (548) Bad night (3090)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.

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  (304): I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator. http://tfl.nu/x5we
  Replies (18) Good night (2801) Bad night (657)
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  (805): View more from California

  i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?

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  (805): i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right? http://tfl.nu/zs4y
  Replies (39) Good night (3093) Bad night (811)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.

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  (816): you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell. http://tfl.nu/74j4
  Replies (30) Good night (925) Bad night (3733)
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  (949): View more from California

  you made cement angels. it was a great sight.

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  (949): you made cement angels. it was a great sight. http://tfl.nu/etc6
  Replies (18) Good night (5958) Bad night (807)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!

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  (612): I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome! http://tfl.nu/jbu3
  Replies (21) Good night (5504) Bad night (540)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring

  (989): View more from Michigan

  i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me

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  (231): my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring (989): i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me http://tfl.nu/18pl
  Replies (21) Good night (6892) Bad night (1014)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."

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  (786): He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets." http://tfl.nu/13ll
  Replies (17) Good night (7593) Bad night (1202)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.

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  (347): Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes. http://tfl.nu/qm7s
  Replies (12) Good night (2446) Bad night (1415)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you

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  (519): I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you http://tfl.nu/mvu5
  Replies (6) Good night (2940) Bad night (904)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.

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  (810): Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow. http://tfl.nu/g382
  Replies (8) Good night (2722) Bad night (1665)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?

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  (917): mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right? http://tfl.nu/fjzr
  Replies (7) Good night (1233) Bad night (753)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka

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  (817): Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka http://tfl.nu/xkay
  Replies (9) Good night (552) Bad night (1206)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?

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  (440): I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card? http://tfl.nu/hh1f
  Replies (2) Good night (423) Bad night (456)

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