I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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