Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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