Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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