Me too!
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
