Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize