What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
