the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
