i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
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Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
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I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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