I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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