We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
