You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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